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I won't eat in a place that has suits of armor.

Alan King

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Alan King
Age: 76 †
Born: 1927
Born: December 26
Died: 2004
Died: May 9
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Stage Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Suits
Place
Armor

More quotes by Alan King

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I was a high school throw-out.
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it's hard to turn away. Then, of course, you're hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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I'm only... I'm only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I'm a... I'm just screaming all over the place with joy.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
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My mother's sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
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I made it, Ma - Carnegie Hall. And I didn't have to practice.
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My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags, an old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: 'Don't end up like me.'
Alan King
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As life's pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs. Now that's better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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It's not easy being a father, but I've been allowed a comeback.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We're reflections. It's a distorted mirror in the fun house. We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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There's a charm, there's a rhythm, there's a soul to Jewish humor. When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, 'You're doing a Jewish act.'
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One thing I've never said in my whole life is, 'Let's have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.'
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else's words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
Alan King
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My mother kept the house clean and we ate good. I didn't know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
Alan King
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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up 'vaudeville' in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says 'Milton Berle' - and he made it just a tremendous party.
Alan King