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I made it, Ma - Carnegie Hall. And I didn't have to practice.

Alan King

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Alan King
Age: 76 †
Born: 1927
Born: December 26
Died: 2004
Died: May 9
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Stage Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Carnegie
Hall
Halls
Practice
Didn
Made

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My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags, an old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: 'Don't end up like me.'
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I don't mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
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Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore's program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
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My mother kept the house clean and we ate good. I didn't know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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My father helped me leave. He said, 'It's all out there, it's not here.'
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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I'm only... I'm only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I'm a... I'm just screaming all over the place with joy.
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It's not easy being a father, but I've been allowed a comeback.
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who's living.
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I always plan dinner first thing in the morning. That's the only way I can get through the day, having a specific meal to look forward to at night.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it's hard to turn away. Then, of course, you're hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!
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My mother's sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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There's nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
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That's the great thing about New Year's, you get to be a year older. For me, that wasn't such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time. When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That's what the trees are all about.
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else's words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
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