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As a parent, I'd - I'd be a better father.

Alan King

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Alan King
Age: 76 †
Born: 1927
Born: December 26
Died: 2004
Died: May 9
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Stage Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Father
Better
Parent

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I made it, Ma - Carnegie Hall. And I didn't have to practice.
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Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore's program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We're reflections. It's a distorted mirror in the fun house. We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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As life's pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs. Now that's better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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I don't mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
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When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I'm going to have for dinner or I can't get through the day.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!
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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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There's a charm, there's a rhythm, there's a soul to Jewish humor. When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, 'You're doing a Jewish act.'
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Modesty is not one of my virtues.
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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One thing I've never said in my whole life is, 'Let's have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.'
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
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I always plan dinner first thing in the morning. That's the only way I can get through the day, having a specific meal to look forward to at night.
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There's nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
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You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody? You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
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