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Jacob is a German Shepherd. (I have never understood why they aren't called German Sheepdogs. What do the Germans call shepherds?)

Alan Coren

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Alan Coren
Age: 69 †
Born: 1938
Born: June 27
Died: 2007
Died: October 18
Editor
Journalist
Writer
German
Dog
Aren
Understood
Called
Shepherd
Call
Jacob
Never
Shepherds
Germans

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Being a personality is not the same thing as having a personality.
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The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it.
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Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they've told you what you think it is you want to hear.
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Ethnically, the Germans are Teutonic... being made up of Vandals, Gepidae, and Goths, all of whom emigrated - south from Sweden in about 500 BC why they emigrated is not exactly clear, but many scholars believe it was because they saw the way Sweden was going, i.e. neutral.
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Enjoy your life today because yesterday had gone and tomorrow may never come
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I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.
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There are many mysteries in old age but the greatest, surely, is this: in those adverts for walk-in bathtubs, why doesn't all the water gush out when you get in?
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Television is more interesting than people. If it were not we should have people standing in the corner of our room.
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The word souvenir has, of course, slightly extended itself in meaning until it now denotes almost anything either breakable or useless but even today, ninety per cent of the items covered by the word are forgettable objects in which cigarettes can be left to go stale.
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Malta is the only country in the world where the local delicacy is the bread.
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