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Our father the novelist my husband the poet. He belongs to the ages - just don't catch him at breakfast. Artists, celebrated for their humanity, they turn out to be scarcely human at all.

Alan Bennett

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Alan Bennett
Age: 90
Born: 1934
Born: May 9
Actor
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Diarist
Film Director
Playwright
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Writer
Turn
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Humanity
Novelists
Age
Breakfast
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Father
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Human
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Scarcely
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More quotes by Alan Bennett

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I can walk. It's just that I'm so rich I don't need to.
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Clichés can be quite fun. That's how they got to be clichés.
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My films are about embarrassment.
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Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache.
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The Breed never dies. Sapper, Buchan, Dornford Yates, practitioners in that school of Snobbery withViolence that runs like a thread of good-class tweed through twentieth-century literature.
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We started off trying to set up a small anarchist community, but people wouldn't obey the rules.
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There is no such thing as a good script, onlya good film, and I'm conscious that my scripts often read better than they play.
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To read is to withdraw.To make oneself unavailable. One would feel easier about it if the pursuit inself were less...selfish.
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Never read the Bible as if it means something. Or at any rate don't try and mean it. Nor prayers. The liturgy is best treated and read as if it's someone announcing the departure of trains.
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So boring you fall asleep halfway through her name.
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Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall.
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It's subjunctive history. You know, the subjunctive? The mood used when something may or may not have happened. When it is imagined.
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Definition of a classic: a book everyone is assumed to have read and often thinks they have.
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Kafka could never have written as he did had he lived in a house. His writing is that of someone whose whole life was spent in apartments, with lifts, stairwells, muffled voices behind closed doors, and sounds through walls. Put him in a nice detached villa and he'd never have written a word.
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Were we closer to the ground as children, or is the grass emptier now?
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History is a commentary on the various and continuing incapabilities of men. What is history? History is women following behind with the bucket.
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At eighty things do not occur they recur.
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Of course my standards are out of date! That's why they're called standards.
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That's a bit like asking a man crawling across the Sahara whether he would prefer Perrier or Malvern water.
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Children always assume the sexual lives of their parents come to a grinding halt at their conception.
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