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Standards are always out of date. That's what makes them standards.

Alan Bennett

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Alan Bennett
Age: 90
Born: 1934
Born: May 9
Actor
Comedian
Diarist
Film Director
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Screenwriter
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Standards
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More quotes by Alan Bennett

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It's the one species I wouldn't mind seeing vanish from the face of the earth. I wish they were like the White Rhinosix of them left in the Serengeti National Park, and all males.
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If I am doing nothing, I like to be doing nothing to some purpose. That is what leisure means.
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That's a bit like asking a man crawling across the Sahara whether he would prefer Perrier or Malvern water.
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At eighty things do not occur they recur.
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We started off trying to set up a small anarchist community, but people wouldn't obey the rules.
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I dont know whether you've ever looked into a miner's eyes for any length of time, that is. Because it is the loveliest blue you've ever seen. I think perhaps that's why I live in Ibiza, because the blue of the Mediterranean, you see, reminds me of the blue of the eyes of those Doncaster miners.
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To play Trivial Pursuit with a life like mine could be said to be a form of homeopathy.
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I saw someone peeing in Jermym Street the other day. I thought, is this the end of civilization as we know it? Or is it simply someone peeing in Jermyn Street?
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I don't talk very well. With writing, you've time to get it right. Also I've found the more I talk the less I write, and if I didn't write no one would want me to talk anyway.
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Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall.
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Memories are not shackles, Franklin, they are garlands.
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The longer I practise medicine, the more convinced I am there are only two types of cases: those that involve taking the trousers off and those that don't.
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Books are not about passing the time. They're about other lives. Other worlds.
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Art comes out of art it begins with imitation, often in the form of parody, and it's in the process of imitating the voice of others that one comes to learn the sound of one's own.
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Those who have known the famous are publicly debriefed of their memories, knowing as their own dusk falls that they will only be remembered for remembering someone else.
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A book is a device to ignite the imagination.
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No mention of God. They keep Him up their sleeves for as long as they can, vicars do. They know it puts people off.
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It was the kind of library he had only read about in books.
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Children always assume the sexual lives of their parents come to a grinding halt at their conception.
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One of the hardest things for boys to learn is that a teacher is human. One of the hardest things for a teacher to learn is not to try and tell them.
Alan Bennett