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But what I kept wondering about is this: that first second when she felt her skirt burning, what did she think? Before she knew it was candles, did she think she'd done it herself? With the amazing turns of her hips, and the warmth of the music inside her, did she believe, for even one glorious second, that her passion had arrived?

Aimee Bender

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Aimee Bender
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: June 28
Novelist
Writer
the United States of America
Done
Knew
Warmth
Even
Wonder
Hips
Believe
Passion
Glorious
Skirt
Think
Turns
Burning
Candles
Thinking
Felt
Kept
Skirts
Music
Amazing
Arrived
Firsts
Second
Wondering
First
Inside
Candle

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I want to be violated by insight.
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While she cut the mushrooms, she cried more than she had at the grave, the most so far, because she found the saddest thing of all to be the simple truth of her capacity to move on.
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As a writer you ask yourself to dream while awake.
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I didn’t mind the quiet stretches. It was like we were trying out the idea of being side by side.
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I felt the crumpled paper that had taken the place of my lungs expand as if released from a fist.
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You can ruin anything if you focus at it.
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You're the perfect girl', he said, rubbing his chin. 'You expect nothing.
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I was with them for all of it, but more like an echo than a participant.
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You try, you seem totally nuts, you go underground.
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The wine glasses are empty except for that one undrinkable red spot at the bottom.
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Mom flipped through the magazines like the pages needed to be slapped.
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and I get refill number three or four and the wine is making my bones loose and it's giving my hair a red sheen and my breasts are blooming and my eyes feel sultry and wise and the dress is water.
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It seems the best work I do is when I am really allowing the unconscious to rule the page and then later I can go back and hack around and make sense of things.
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Light is good company, when alone I took my comfort where I found it, and the warmest yellow bulb in the living-room lamp had become a kind of radiant babysitter all its own.
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There's a gift in your lap and it's beautifully wrapped and it's not your birthday. You feel wonderful, you feel like somebody knows you're alive, you feel fear because it could be a bomb, because you think you're that important.
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It is all about numbers. It is all about sequence. It's the mathematical logic of being alive. If everything kept to its normal progression, we would live with the sadness-cry and then walk-but what really breaks us cleanest are the losses that happen out of order.
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The writing I tend to think of as 'good' is good because it's mysterious.
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Many kids, it seemed, would find out that their parents were flawed, messed-up people later in life, and I didn't appreciate getting to know it all so strong and early.
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I could feel the tears beginning to collect in my throat again, but I pushed them apart, away from each other. Tears are only a threat in groups.
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