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I love that magazine, man - Victoria's Secret - and it comes, like, every three hours.

Adam Ferrara

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Adam Ferrara
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: February 2
Actor
Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Queens
New York
Hours
Funny
Comes
Three
Victoria
Every
Magazine
Men
Magazines
Love
Humor
Like
Secret

More quotes by Adam Ferrara

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Whenever she uses the phrase 'I was thinking...,' that means I either have to move, paint or buy something.
Adam Ferrara
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If you look at a group of people that had faith, it's got to be the Jews. They followed Moses through the desert for 40 years with no map. There had to be one guy in the back, like, 'I don't think he knows where he's going.'
Adam Ferrara
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One day in the shower, you figure it out. It's a special day in a man's life. I was like, 'Oh, I found me a hobby.'
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My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam - uh, don't kiss guys.'
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The human body is in constant change the minute we're born. It's in a constant state of decay. We're all like Ford Escorts, just falling apart.
Adam Ferrara
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I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
Adam Ferrara
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There were many reasons we broke up. There was a religious difference: I'm a Catholic, and she's the devil.
Adam Ferrara
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The biggest thing in my life right now is my girlfriend. I love this girl. I know I love her because she told me.
Adam Ferrara
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I know she's just trying to make things nice, so I do my part. Now, when I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, I turn on the light. I used to just go by sonar: just keep peeing 'til you hear water.
Adam Ferrara
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You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don't let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, 'Well, why'd you put this spoon in this drawer then?' 'Just to p-s you off, that's why! I got spoons hidden all over this house! Keep it up, and your napkin rings are gonna start disappearing.'
Adam Ferrara
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I got into cars through my father. He used to work on cars. My job was to hold the light, which pretty much was the limit of my mechanical abilities.
Adam Ferrara
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Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you're happy, you let us touch you.
Adam Ferrara
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I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate humans date. There's no dating in the animal kingdom. No dinner, no movie - just a quick sniff, 'Alright, let's go.'
Adam Ferrara
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I don't think I'll ever meet the perfect woman. I might have to get me one of them mail order women. You can do that: you send away to the Philippines, and they send you a wife. The only thing is, once you're on their mailing list, they keep sending you a relative a month whether you want it or not.
Adam Ferrara
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My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you - I hope she meets somebody nice.
Adam Ferrara
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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'
Adam Ferrara
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Men tend to lie when it comes to sexual conquests. You should hear some of the ego-driven lies my friends have told me: 'Swear to God, man - the hooker gave the money back.'
Adam Ferrara
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If you're in California and it's raining, stay home, because nobody can drive in the rain. It's like it's raining frogs. They're terrified.
Adam Ferrara
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I sincerely want to meet the girl that was meant for me, but I want to sleep with the girls that weren't.
Adam Ferrara
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I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good - stop.'
Adam Ferrara