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My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.

Adam Ferrara

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Adam Ferrara
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: February 2
Actor
Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Queens
New York
Car
Spend
Guy
Working
Bigs
Wanted
Time
Dad

More quotes by Adam Ferrara

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I love to believe that there's one god but there's many different religions so there's just the question of which long distance company you pick.
Adam Ferrara
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You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don't let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, 'Well, why'd you put this spoon in this drawer then?' 'Just to p-s you off, that's why! I got spoons hidden all over this house! Keep it up, and your napkin rings are gonna start disappearing.'
Adam Ferrara
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Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you're happy, you let us touch you.
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I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
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What if God's a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I'll never know why!
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As soon as you lay down, that's when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. 'Goodnight, baby.' 'Do you think we were together in a past life?' 'Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.' 'Don't you feel like we're soul...'
Adam Ferrara
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I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate humans date. There's no dating in the animal kingdom. No dinner, no movie - just a quick sniff, 'Alright, let's go.'
Adam Ferrara
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I love that magazine, man - Victoria's Secret - and it comes, like, every three hours.
Adam Ferrara
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My favorite Catholic holiday is Easter. For those of you that don't know, Easter is the day we celebrate Jesus rising from the grave and coming back to Earth as a rabbit that hides colored eggs.
Adam Ferrara
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If you're in California and it's raining, stay home, because nobody can drive in the rain. It's like it's raining frogs. They're terrified.
Adam Ferrara
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I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good - stop.'
Adam Ferrara
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If you look at a group of people that had faith, it's got to be the Jews. They followed Moses through the desert for 40 years with no map. There had to be one guy in the back, like, 'I don't think he knows where he's going.'
Adam Ferrara
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My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you - I hope she meets somebody nice.
Adam Ferrara
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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'
Adam Ferrara
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I don't think I'll ever meet the perfect woman. I might have to get me one of them mail order women. You can do that: you send away to the Philippines, and they send you a wife. The only thing is, once you're on their mailing list, they keep sending you a relative a month whether you want it or not.
Adam Ferrara
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I know she's just trying to make things nice, so I do my part. Now, when I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, I turn on the light. I used to just go by sonar: just keep peeing 'til you hear water.
Adam Ferrara
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Whenever she uses the phrase 'I was thinking...,' that means I either have to move, paint or buy something.
Adam Ferrara
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I talk a lot about women in my act, 'cause let's face it -- if I was hungry, I would talk about food.
Adam Ferrara
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The girls are beautiful in Hollywood - and enough silicon to caulk a sink.
Adam Ferrara
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My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam - uh, don't kiss guys.'
Adam Ferrara