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One day in the shower, you figure it out. It's a special day in a man's life. I was like, 'Oh, I found me a hobby.'

Adam Ferrara

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Adam Ferrara
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: February 2
Actor
Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Queens
New York
Like
Figures
Humor
Comedy
Special
Hobby
Funny
Shower
Found
Hobbies
Men
Showers
Life
Figure

More quotes by Adam Ferrara

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I love that magazine, man - Victoria's Secret - and it comes, like, every three hours.
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The human body is in constant change the minute we're born. It's in a constant state of decay. We're all like Ford Escorts, just falling apart.
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My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.
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I know she's just trying to make things nice, so I do my part. Now, when I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, I turn on the light. I used to just go by sonar: just keep peeing 'til you hear water.
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I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
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Men tend to lie when it comes to sexual conquests. You should hear some of the ego-driven lies my friends have told me: 'Swear to God, man - the hooker gave the money back.'
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I talk a lot about women in my act, 'cause let's face it -- if I was hungry, I would talk about food.
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The girls are beautiful in Hollywood - and enough silicon to caulk a sink.
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Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you're happy, you let us touch you.
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As soon as you lay down, that's when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. 'Goodnight, baby.' 'Do you think we were together in a past life?' 'Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.' 'Don't you feel like we're soul...'
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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'
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My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam - uh, don't kiss guys.'
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I love to believe that there's one god but there's many different religions so there's just the question of which long distance company you pick.
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If you look at a group of people that had faith, it's got to be the Jews. They followed Moses through the desert for 40 years with no map. There had to be one guy in the back, like, 'I don't think he knows where he's going.'
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I got into cars through my father. He used to work on cars. My job was to hold the light, which pretty much was the limit of my mechanical abilities.
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The only marriage I've observed for any length of time is my parents - 35 years. I asked my pop, I go, 'Pop, 35 years - what do you hope for?' He's like, 'I hope you die first.'
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If you're in California and it's raining, stay home, because nobody can drive in the rain. It's like it's raining frogs. They're terrified.
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I love my girlfriend, don't get me wrong. I truly love this woman, but I have the ability to have sex without any emotional involvement. It's a gift.
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What if God's a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I'll never know why!
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The biggest thing in my life right now is my girlfriend. I love this girl. I know I love her because she told me.
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