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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Looks
Dude
Feels
Blown
Great
Wearing
Like
Gay
Realize
Realizing
Getting
Look
Crocs
More quotes by Adam Carolla
You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.
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I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can't just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
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When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.
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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything they just don't vote that way.
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I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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The very definition of 'beauty' is outside.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It's a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
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We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it. Telling them to stop isn't going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.
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I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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It's like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
Adam Carolla
