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California is like the hot blond high school chick who's been getting by on her looks, but now she's 45 and falling apart.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Getting
Blond
Fall
Chick
School
Chicks
Looks
Hot
Like
Falling
California
Apart
High
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
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When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much.
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Everyone keeps saying, Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating. It's like saying, How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt? I don't care.
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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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I get depressed at airports.
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Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
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It's like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
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If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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I don't like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
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You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.
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It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
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I'm a comedian, not a politician.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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