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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Judging
Asking
Someone
Like
Advance
Judge
Smell
More quotes by Adam Carolla
You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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I've got a great eye for color. I'm like a chick.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.
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I get depressed at airports.
Adam Carolla
If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you're going to be sorely disappointed.
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When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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If you've driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it's like a golf course... Real estate values go 'boom!'
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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
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My first car was a motorcycle.
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I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
Adam Carolla
If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
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Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can't you do.
Adam Carolla
I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
Adam Carolla
I'm not sexist, I'm just a realist.
Adam Carolla
