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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Time
Life
More quotes by Adam Carolla
When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
Adam Carolla
I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.
Adam Carolla
I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.
Adam Carolla
Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
Adam Carolla
If you've driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it's like a golf course... Real estate values go 'boom!'
Adam Carolla
Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything they just don't vote that way.
Adam Carolla
I have no connection with Hollywood. I'm not interested. I don't care.
Adam Carolla
Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
Adam Carolla
I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
Adam Carolla
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
Adam Carolla
Rich people don't pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes - they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn't pay taxes.
Adam Carolla
Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
Adam Carolla
People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
Adam Carolla
I get depressed at airports.
Adam Carolla
I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
Adam Carolla
That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?
Adam Carolla
If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
Adam Carolla
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
Adam Carolla
If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
Adam Carolla
No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
Adam Carolla
