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Don’t do your best, do my best.

Adam Carolla

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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
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Adam Carolla
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My motto is more mystery, less history.
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The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don't have a compelling host then you have nothing.
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No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
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I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
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I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.
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He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.
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I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much.
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All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything they just don't vote that way.
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I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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