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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Type
Humor
Funny
Two
Give
Orgasms
Women
Types
Giving
Fake
None
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.
Adam Carolla
Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
Adam Carolla
A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.
Adam Carolla
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
Adam Carolla
We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it. Telling them to stop isn't going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.
Adam Carolla
If you've driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it's like a golf course... Real estate values go 'boom!'
Adam Carolla
If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.
Adam Carolla
A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money - do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
Adam Carolla
I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
Adam Carolla
If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
Adam Carolla
I didn't have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
Adam Carolla
My first car was a motorcycle.
Adam Carolla
The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don't have a compelling host then you have nothing.
Adam Carolla
Don’t do your best, do my best.
Adam Carolla
I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
Adam Carolla
All's the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
Adam Carolla
Everyone keeps saying, Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating. It's like saying, How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt? I don't care.
Adam Carolla
You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
Adam Carolla
Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything they just don't vote that way.
Adam Carolla
If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
Adam Carolla