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Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can't just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Humor
Diarrhea
Funny
Coaster
Enjoy
Condom
Hands
Coasters
Without
Roller
Like
Riding
Throw
Sex
More quotes by Adam Carolla
Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
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Everyone keeps saying, Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating. It's like saying, How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt? I don't care.
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I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
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The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
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I'm not sexist, I'm just a realist.
Adam Carolla
Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
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I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.
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I've always boxed, I always taught boxing.
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If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
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Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything they just don't vote that way.
Adam Carolla
