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When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Fast
Humor
College
Grow
Grows
Fudge
Funny
Triple
White
Packing
People
Asian
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I know everything because I know nothing.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money - do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.
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I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
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Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
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I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
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I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.
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I don't know anything about computers.
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I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
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Rich people don't pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes - they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn't pay taxes.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
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You don't realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It's a card you get so you can navigate society.
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My first car was a motorcycle.
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