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You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.

Adam Carolla

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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Humor
Waiting
Dies
Funny
Home
Goth
Going
Clubs
Wait
Kill

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If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
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That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.
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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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I don't know anything about computers.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'
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It's something I've always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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