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I'm not sexist, I'm just a realist.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Sexist
Realist
More quotes by Adam Carolla
People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'
Adam Carolla
There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
Adam Carolla
The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
Adam Carolla
I have no connection with Hollywood. I'm not interested. I don't care.
Adam Carolla
I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.
Adam Carolla
People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
Adam Carolla
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
Adam Carolla
Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
Adam Carolla
Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!
Adam Carolla
You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
Adam Carolla
If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
Adam Carolla
Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.
Adam Carolla
When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.
Adam Carolla
[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail twice a month.
Adam Carolla
I know everything because I know nothing.
Adam Carolla
I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
Adam Carolla
No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.
Adam Carolla
Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
Adam Carolla
I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
Adam Carolla
All's the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
Adam Carolla