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When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Brother
Playing
Team
Guy
Take
Picking
Odds
Basketball
More quotes by Adam Carolla
When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.
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Don’t do your best, do my best.
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.
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People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
Adam Carolla
