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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Funny
Take
Naps
Figure
Figures
Humor
Comedy
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
Adam Carolla
You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
Adam Carolla
In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
Adam Carolla
If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.
Adam Carolla
I've always boxed, I always taught boxing.
Adam Carolla
Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
Adam Carolla
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
Adam Carolla
Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
Adam Carolla
If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
Adam Carolla
All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
Adam Carolla
You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
Adam Carolla
I'm a comedian, not a politician.
Adam Carolla
It's like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
Adam Carolla
You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
Adam Carolla
California is like the hot blond high school chick who's been getting by on her looks, but now she's 45 and falling apart.
Adam Carolla
I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.
Adam Carolla
People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
Adam Carolla
My first car was a motorcycle.
Adam Carolla
I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
Adam Carolla
I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.
Adam Carolla
