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When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Smell
Humor
Heralds
Sound
Trumpet
Funny
Arrival
Makes
Arrivals
Fart
Trumpets
Ass
More quotes by Adam Carolla
Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.
Adam Carolla
The shuttle is the worst $20 you'll ever save. It adds 90 minutes to whatever a Town Car or cab would have been. You have the unenviable choice between being dropped off last or being dropped off first and having a bunch of losers who can't afford cab fare and have no friends or loved ones with cars knowing exactly where you live.
Adam Carolla
You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.
Adam Carolla
I don't know anything about computers.
Adam Carolla
It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I've done so much morning radio that I won't be overwhelmed by it, but it's still going to be a challenge.
Adam Carolla
Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
Adam Carolla
People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
Adam Carolla
I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
Adam Carolla
I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.
Adam Carolla
Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
Adam Carolla
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
Adam Carolla
Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.
Adam Carolla
Everyone keeps saying, Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating. It's like saying, How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt? I don't care.
Adam Carolla
Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
Adam Carolla
You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
Adam Carolla
The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
Adam Carolla
The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
Adam Carolla
When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
Adam Carolla
I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
Adam Carolla
Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
Adam Carolla