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All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Funny
Nothing
Really
Glad
Aren
Humor
Middle
More quotes by Adam Carolla
If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
Adam Carolla
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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All's the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
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I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
Adam Carolla
That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
Adam Carolla
It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
Adam Carolla
I don't normally vote. I'm lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.
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No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
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My first car was a motorcycle.
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That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?
Adam Carolla
I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
Adam Carolla
I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.
Adam Carolla
If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
Adam Carolla
I know everything because I know nothing.
Adam Carolla
Welfare is monetary methadone.
Adam Carolla