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I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Thinking
Drink
Pussy
Like
Whatever
Tea
World
Understand
Soft
Makes
Soccer
Look
Coffee
Looks
Everywhere
Way
Biggest
Think
Telling
Pussies
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.
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If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you're going to be sorely disappointed.
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I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
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When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.
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I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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I don't normally vote. I'm lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?
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No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.
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If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
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People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
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I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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I used to be a Democrat, now I'm basically a Republican.
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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.
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You don't realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It's a card you get so you can navigate society.
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He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.
Adam Carolla
