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You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Six
Eating
Humor
Minutes
Takes
Funny
Microwave
Anything
Microwaves
Shouldn
More quotes by Adam Carolla
I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you're going to be sorely disappointed.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can't you do.
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Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
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I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
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Don’t do your best, do my best.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I've worked with women, I've never had an issue with women.
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I'm a comedian, not a politician.
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My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'
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I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.
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My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
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What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers.
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I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.
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