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I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Unless
Least
Superstitious
Chance
Picking
Running
Chances
Take
Nose
Swear
Noses
Car
More quotes by Adam Carolla
The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.
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I don't burn any calories trying to be masculine I just happen to be from that world.
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The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
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If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
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I'm a comedian, not a politician.
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California is like the hot blond high school chick who's been getting by on her looks, but now she's 45 and falling apart.
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I don't know anything about computers.
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It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I've done so much morning radio that I won't be overwhelmed by it, but it's still going to be a challenge.
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
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Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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If you're a guy, you have absolutely no idea what's going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here's what you know: you know when you're getting laid, and you know when it's all over. Those are the only two things you're aware of.
Adam Carolla
