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I don't know anything about computers.

Adam Carolla

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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Computers
Computer
Anything

More quotes by Adam Carolla

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I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.
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Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!
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I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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Oprah tells women what to read, what to eat, what to think, what to do.
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.
Adam Carolla
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.
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I didn't have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
Adam Carolla
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
Adam Carolla
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When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
Adam Carolla
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
Adam Carolla
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
Adam Carolla
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
Adam Carolla
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The shuttle is the worst $20 you'll ever save. It adds 90 minutes to whatever a Town Car or cab would have been. You have the unenviable choice between being dropped off last or being dropped off first and having a bunch of losers who can't afford cab fare and have no friends or loved ones with cars knowing exactly where you live.
Adam Carolla
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There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
Adam Carolla