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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.

Adam Carolla

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Adam Carolla
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 27
American Football Player
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
LA
California
Adam Lakers Carolla
Ace Rockolla
Recycl-A-Rolla
Ace in the Hole
Ace carolla
Carolla
Adam Corrolla
Adam corola
Adam corolla
Adam Carolla
Half
Even
Comically
Time
Oriented
People
Complaining
Laugh
Angry
Laughing
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I don't normally vote. I'm lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
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I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.
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Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians I'm just not a reader.
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I like radio and live performing stuff. I don't like the television stuff as much.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
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No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.
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That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.
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My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
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I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
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It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
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