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It is almost impossible to throw dirt on someone without getting a little on yourself

Abigail Van Buren

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Abigail Van Buren
Someone
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More quotes by Abigail Van Buren

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Never advise anyone to go to war or to get married.
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Never give a golfer an ultimatum unless you're prepared to lose.
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A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.
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How should they answer?
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If you want a place in the sun, you have got to put up with a few blisters.
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If you are looking for a kindly, well-to-do older gentleman who is no longer interested in sex, take out an ad in The Wall Street Journal.
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Some People are more turned on by money than they are by love. In one respect they're alike. They're both wonderful as long as they last.
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It is totally unconscionable to subject defenseless animals to mutilation and death, just so a company can be the first to market a new shade of nail polish or a new, improved laundry detergent. It's cruel, it's brutal, it's inhumane, and most people don't want it.
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Cruel words erode the self-esteem like the ocean eats away the shore.
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True, a little learning is a dangerous thing, but it still beats total ignorance.
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You are what you are when nobody is looking.
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You could move.' ---Dear Abby responds to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the street and wanted to know what he could do to improve the quality of the neighborhood.
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Fighting fire with fire only gets you ashes!
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Kissing power is stronger than will power: Girls need to prove their love like a moose needs a hat rack.
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If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.
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Psychotherapy, unlike castor oil, which will work no matter how you get it down, is useless when forced on an uncooperative patient.
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A bad habit never disappears miraculously, it's an undo-it-yourself project.
Abigail Van Buren
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There is no end to the undeserved misery and mischief it could create.
Abigail Van Buren
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Accept every blind date you can get, even with a girl who wears jeans. Maybe you can talk her out of them.
Abigail Van Buren
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O, heavenly Father: we thank thee for food and remember the hungry. We thank thee for health and remember the sick. We thank thee for friends and remember the friendless. We thank thee for freedom and remember the enslaved. May these remembrances stir us to service, That thy gifts to us may be used for others. Amen.
Abigail Van Buren